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(no subject)

November 24th, 2009 (09:27 pm)
music: belle and sebastian-act of apostle

i'm in a state of transition, which i suppose isn't really a state at all but more so of a feeling in motion.
i can be as vague as i want but i miss so many things. i am missing.
i want to be thrown back into what i used to be and what i used to do but everything is still.
i am still.
i am not growing.
and nothing can be more frustrating than that.

(no subject)

May 8th, 2009 (11:43 pm)

the fuck?

i didn't get accepted into occidental. i feel like i have no sense of direction.
i can clean my room, organize my closet, maintain a 3.6 gpa, travel central and south america, drink myself into oblivion, and still feel completely lacking.
i guess i thought that once i realized my educational and career goals i wouldn't have a problem reaching and fulfilling them.
it's time to figure out what plan b is.
internships? jobs? volunteering? travel?
i just really wanted to go back to eagle rock.

lima, cusco, ollantaytambo, cusco, lima, los angeles.

March 18th, 2009 (04:51 pm)


tomorrow i'm going to peru to hang out with the alpacas for a week.
i'll be celebrating my 22nd birthday at machu picchu.
i'll be taking three cameras, my love, and sense of adventure.
i've been brushing up on my spanish however, not all the places we'll be staying at speak english or spanish.
we'll see how it goes!

i love you all.

(no subject)

February 14th, 2009 (11:12 am)


today is bittersweet.
i will never forget the feeling this day brought to me one year ago. i will never forget the feelings that we shared four years ago.
you are forever in my heart. you are forever in all of our hearts.
we love you and miss you.

happy valentines day.

an excerpt of our filming adventures by aimee goguen.

November 22nd, 2008 (02:17 pm)
music: elliott smith-condor ave.

We take the magical helmet with many heads always talking, fifteen gallons of paint, the camera, and the glitter. Ready for adventure in complete darkness, the moon is missing and the mountains are as black as the sky. We are not afraid of the unknown. Nothing could leave from us, not this feeling, we are together till the end.
We head out in a shitty Volvo station wagon, seemingly skeletal in frame holding not even the engine, leather seats become weightless holding young bodies warm and desperate. This car is not safe.
We drive through a national forest and an x zoo off the freeway. The road becomes narrow and forbidden. We park the car and light cigarettes.

“Now is the time to turn around, to not continue”

We are hesitant but decide to leave the car.
A girl screams in the distance her voice echoes through the canyon, into the mountains and through desert rivers. Rivers holding nothing but sand and rock and grain. Her sound is with us so we continue walking and searching, knowing it would lead us to a lady and that lady could very well be dead by the time we reach her.

“I will kill you, you fucking whore”
“you don’t know me, you don’t understand”

(no subject)

October 5th, 2008 (02:42 pm)

some songs will always feel like funeral songs.

as beautiful as they may be, they will always hurt.

(no subject)

August 20th, 2008 (01:20 pm)
music: lou reed


i'm growing out my hair
and acting out of character.

sometimes, it's just a thing that must be done.

(no subject)

July 22nd, 2008 (04:14 pm)


rest in peace estelle getty.
you always made me laugh.

george carlin

June 23rd, 2008 (12:53 pm)


i watched his standup almost every day. it was always being aired on showtime in the wee hours of the morning and because i can be such an insomniac at times, i always stayed up to watch.
i always wanted to see him live but never made the effort.
i will miss the things that he will never say.
rest in peace.

i want one of these!

May 18th, 2008 (07:06 pm)


oh little papillions, i love you so.

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